Unfortunately, life is full of hurdles and roadblocks. It’s unavoidable. I’ve been reading a popular book this past week and I’ve learned that true happiness comes from pain? What? Yeh, I know. That’s what I thought at first too. And then I finished the chapter and couldn’t wait to experience a smile or two as a result of the pain I chose. So, What’s your pain and how do you celebrate it? Find out…
The book I started reading is titled, The Subtle Art of Not Giving A F*ck. At first, I was thinking, well, damn this is on the edge of pessimistic – should I take a risk and read this? I spent a lot of my life turning my pessimistic thoughts into positive ones, so I was a little apprehensive.
Will I get anything good from it or will it be a waste of my time?
I thought I’d give it a try and if after the first chapter I didn’t like it I would stop reading and move on to my next book.
I ended the first chapter and loved it! Despite the plethora of F-bombs Mark, the author, definitely is on to something in this thing called life, so I continued on.
I got a few chapters in and came to the chapter titled, Struggles. While I was reading this chapter a light bulb went off. Basically, the message of the chapter is that you can’t avoid pain and that when you try to you just get more pain piled on top of your current pain.
And, guess what guys?
Happiness comes from pain.
Is your mind blown? Mine sure was.
The author says that happiness comes from pain because solving real, meaningful problems give us reason to be happy and celebrate. He suggests rather than focusing on the outcomes or the victories you want to achieve, ask yourself instead what pain or hurdles in life might make you happy enough to endure, follow through and ultimately solve?
Let me give you an example.
Not everyone can run a marathon right?! Right. In fact, only about 1% of people actually run and complete a marathon. Why? Because those who run marathons are in love with the process just as much as the outcome; the finish line.
Marriage isn’t easy. At. All. It’s hard. Hard AF. But, when I started thinking about my marriage in relation to the pain I love that makes it all worth it in the end, I came to the conclusion that my marriage is the pain I choose to work through. It’s the pain I choose to struggle with. It’s the pain that brings real happiness when a new mountain peak has been conquered in our relationship.
Not to mention having a family. Kids are just as hard. Parenting is not for the weak. It’s a day-in, day-out F*cking Mt. Kilamonjaro. Even though some days I think I’ll never reach the top, I ultimately do and when I do I give myself a fist pump in the mirror. I give myself a reward. (Ahem, self-care!)
The moral of the blog is… My marriage and my family is my pain. The pain I’ll take any day over anything else. Because the truth is, pain is real, everyone experiences it and if I get a choice I’d damn well choose my hubs and my babies in heartbeat.
So, what’s the pain you choose to enjoy? Who or what in your life means so much to you that you’re willing to suffer through it all and win in the end for a big ‘ole slice of happy pie? Comment below. I want to know.