It’s not what you lost; it’s what lost you.

I can’t believe I’ve lived 42 years and this past week is the first time I’ve realized that I didn’t lose those boyfriends, that college entry, that job, that friendship, that house, etc. – they lost ME.

Yes, you heard it right. All these things lost me. And, suddenly I smile.

I was listening to a podcast the other week, and the speaker (a popular guest on the Elvis Duran show) made this comment that has since changed my entire outlook on many facets of my life past and my future.

He (the speaker) said, “I didn’t lose that job – it lost me.”

Seriously. Have you ever heard a more impactful statement in your life?

It’s sad that I have gone through so many years of my life thinking that I was an ordinary human being. Losing at things left and right. When in reality these things were missing out on me. How profound.

It made me think of the first time I got fired (yes, I said the first time, and yes, there was a second). I was so humiliated, ashamed and lost. I was never given a reason. I wrecked my brain for months upon months, continuously asking myself, “What did I do? How can I fix it? Will anyone ever hire me again?”

I cried many tears, rested my head on many shoulders, and ran so, so, so many miles to try and get over it or at least to reach a conclusion. I thought to myself; I can’t believe I failed. I failed the people I managed, my family and myself.

I was in a deep despair that year. I had lost all hope of feeling worthy. Why? Well, simply because I had invested all of my confidence in my career. Yes, it was everything to me. People invest their confidence in many things. From their material possessions, their relationships, to their intellect and so on. Herein lies the problem.

I spent so much time focusing on my career and the accomplishments I made, that when I lost it (or so I thought), I didn’t know who I was anymore or what was next. Fear ran through me like a nervous tremble – reaching my veins, my muscles, and my bones.

If only I knew then at that time several years ago, what I had just discovered this past week. That job that I had thought I lost – well, it LOST ME.

Thank you sweet baby Jesus! It lost me!

It lost my intelligence, my expertise, my kindness, my savvy, my humor, my two-shits, my excellent work ethic, my confidence, my class, and so much more.

When I say, “It lost me.” There’s something about that phrase that just lifts the weight from my shoulders and the burden from my heart. It makes me smile and releases endorphins. It heals me and is an excellent reminder that we are all unique and fabulous in our own special way. We all have something to give. We all have a particular combination of a bunch of little somethings inside us that no one else does. And, that’s our value. So, the next time you feel like you’re about to lose something, or maybe you’ve already lost it? Keep this in mind.

We don’t lose things. They LOSE US. And, that’s damn good enough for me.

What’s lost you lately? What have you gained from it?






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