5 of the funniest things runners can appreciate and non-runners can laugh at

So, over the weekend on my long run (as I had so much time to think), I noticed some pretty funny things my runner buds would know about and appreciate but wanted to share with everyone well, because they are just too funny not to share.

Anyone who knows me knows that I love to laugh – especially at myself. No, but really humor is such an important part of living a happy life and I have my Dad to thank for that. Sometimes it’s all you need to break the ice, or to lift your spirits. Ok, here goes!

  1. We pay to run – Yes, we actually spend our hard earned money to enter a road race – of which we could do for free anytime, any day, anywhere. Ok, so seriously guys, in high school I used to fake being sick to get out of gym days when we were scheduled to run. Now, I scour the internet and get into some pretty deep convos with friends on what race I need to enter next. And, oh, by the way – these races aren’t cheap. Most are at least around $100 each – that’s as much as a Stitch Fix or five Yogi Surprise boxes!!! Whaaat?!
  2. Shhh! Sometimes we’re party poopers – Several times over the course of one of my training seasons I’ve turned down a happy hour, a game day party, a girl’s night out, and even a date night out with the hubs all because I needed to get to bed early, didn’t want to drink, and yes, I even turned down a fun time because I needed to foam roll or take an Epsom salt bath. Ha! Oh my gosh, just writing this is making me crack up at myself. But, hey, you can’t say we are not committed – right? Although don’t leave us off the party list, we still like to be included.
  3. We stalk our own house – It’s true. At the end of a run, we will run past our house repeatedly until that clock ticks to 5 miles instead of 4.9 miles because we need to see that whole number! Seriously, I’m pretty sure my neighbors think there is something wrong with me when they see me going back and forth by my front door. My hubs just told me the other day when I was running past the house that the little six-year-old neighbor kids said, “Does she know she lives here?” It’s kind of like a hyper little dog who is just so excited to be outside and they just run laps back and forth – for fun.
  4. Pause or die – Ok, so we all know we get a little “miss pissy pants” when we forget to pause or un-pause our tracking devices – am I right? I mean, I need every second I can get when I’m trying to hit my negative splits or my new PR. All this work, all this time for nothing because I forgot to hit pause (Waaaaaa!!!!!). There should be an alarm or a reminder, although I’m sure there is a device or app that does that I just don’t know about it or I’m too lazy to try and figure out the settings – lol!
  5. Weather.com is our favorite bookmark – Yes, there are many of us runners who are BIG weather nerds. Rainy days make us sad. No, not because it’s depressing and we have to carry an umbrella, more so because it affects our run and we had a plan! Oh, we’re getting a major snowstorm? Ok, well let’s look at the day after and hope that the temp rises above freezing and melts all the snow so we don’t miss our miles. Did someone say hot and humid? Ok, well, I guess I’ll have to wake up at 2am for my run tomorrow – way before the sun comes out. 60 miles per hour winds – crap. I don’t know if I can trump that one. See what’s going on here?

Whoops. I lied. I thought of another one.

  1. Runner envy – We’ve all been out driving around and see the occasional runner striding down the road with a big ‘ole smile and suddenly have a feeling of jumping out of the car comes over us and yes, we seriously want to jump out of the car, cancel all of our plans and start running with a complete stranger. It’s like a little kid having to stare at their birthday presents all wrapped up pretty, but hey, you can’t open them for another week yet, cause it’s not your birthday – it’s not your time!

Ok, so it’s your turn. I’m 100% positive I’ve missed a ton more hilarious things about us crazy group of running machines. You got one for me let’s hear it – pop a comment below!

4 Comments

  1. This list is so true!! I get runner envy the worst if I’m injured and can’t run lol. I’ve had people ask me (genuinely bewildered) about why i would pay so much money to run marathons lol

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